Today seems surreal – I had a scheduled doctors appointment with Dr. N. I didn’t have to wait as long as usual. I walked in, took my seat, we went over all the results from the last blood work – talked about how I was feeling and then he said… “Your labs are remarkable, you are officially in remission.” It didn’t process right away … I feel like I have been told so many things so many times I don’t even want to feel anything anymore. Karen, the director of the infusion clinic and Dr. N right hand woman came in and Dr. N told her the news, he seemed so excited, they both did. I had some tests done and I walked out the door and I felt nothing still. I know this is huge, I know that since Nov 2011 I have been really sick – sometimes much worse than others, but all in all, I wasn’t looking to hot.
I called Val, told her the news, she paused, I could tell she was so happy, she was almost choking on her words (something that doesn’t happen to her too often) … I called Memre of course she had 1000 questions. I called my Dad, he was the most excited of them all. He was loud and happy and I know when he said “this is the best news we have had in a long time,” he meant it. I still didn’t feel much. I went back to the office, told the girls I work with they were so happy, I told my boss and she even hugged me. It all felt so good but inside of me – I still didn’t feel anything much.
Then social media kicks on I see Facebook status and tweets that look like this:
and then all of a sudden I felt something … I felt what it means to really love people and have people that love you. Reading this I know they feel genuine happiness and excitement. I know because its how I feel when they tell me things.
Last week when I attended Hoopla, the national conference for Stella Dot, one of the keynote speakers said he is the “luckiest man because of the woman in his life” … that sentence is resigning with me tonight. I know, I am the LUCKIEST girl, because of the people in my life, that I choose to surround myself with, that I love more than anything.
Today marks a new chapter – I am so excited to write the next one!